I took an awesome class about the Sociology of Death & Dying. We took a tour of the medical examiner's office. We learned about the Kübler-Ross model of the stages of grief. We also looked at another sociologist, who talked about how the stages existed on a sort of figure eight, and you could enter at any point, go through the 5 stages in any order, and even skip stages (maybe to come back to them later, maybe not). Kübler-Ross herself said that, "these stages do not necessarily come in order, nor are all stages experienced by all patients. She stated, however, that a person will always experience at least two of the stages. Often, people will experience several stages in a "roller coaster" effect—switching between two or more stages, returning to one or more several times before working through it."
I know that I spent weeks vacillating between denial, anger, bargaining, and depression. Some of these stages were experienced when I first found those text messages between him and the neighbour, some when he admitted he slept with her (in Sept), and I continued to jump in and out of that figure eight of grief from his work Christmas party in December until now.
Every once in a while I will experience a fleeting moment of sadness or anger - but I truly believe I am entering into acceptance.
Here I am, continuing to move forward, 6 months after we separated.
For the most part I have taken back my maiden name - including my driver's license, my bank account & all other financial records, at work, and on social media. I am in the process of changing my marital status with the government.
It feels good. I feel like I am breaking free.
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