Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Weekly Update: March 19 to 25

The weekend before, where I missed my WW meeting on March 15, was a crazy weekend filled with going out for dinner multiple times and lots of delicious food.  So after all that I was back to WW on March 22.

Weight Watchers Weigh-In:

Original Weight: 314.8
Previous Weight (March 8): 266.4
Today's Weight (March 22): 266.9
Change: +0.5
Total Loss: -47.9

Total Loss since May 2012: -55.3
Total Loss since Nov 2005: -69.5

SP Weigh In
Previous Weight (March 8): 263.6
Today's Weight (March 26): 263.6

Not bad at all.  I will take going up just half a pound.  I am really hoping for a 1 to 2 pound loss this week.  On my home scale I was back down to the lowest I have been over the past couple of months.

With Sparkpeople I am taking part in the BL Spring Into Action challenge.  It's the same group of women that I connected with for the Winter challenge.  I really want to do better this time around, but that is not going to happen unless I get off my arse.  I hate sounding like a broken record in regards to exercise.

If the weather would just warm up I could go for walks at lunch and/or in the evenings - but instead we got more snow and wind today.  Some spring we are having so far.  

Monday, March 24, 2014

I Am Important

image courtesy EpiphanysCorner on Etsy - quote by Kathleen Stockett, The Help    
It's true what Aibileen says to Mae Mobley in "The Help" - and I too am kind, smart and important.  Somehow I forgot some of this while being married to my jerk ex-husband.

I have been reading a blog about cheating spouses (Chump Lady) and as a result I have come to a few realizations: 
I am never going to know all the "whys" - why he frequented pornography sites, why he exchanged naked pictures with numerous women, why he slept with the 20 year old neighbour, why he started an emotional (that I am sure turned physical) affair with his new co-worker.
It doesn't matter.  All I would get from him is most likely a bunch of lies.  He cheated because he could.  It's not complicated.  He sucks and there is nothing I can do to change that.  All I can do is move on with my life.   
When looking back, although I try to keep that to a minimum, I can see that I was quite different from the other women he "dated".  I am smart.  I have a university degree and an after degree.  Sure, I don't actually work in either of the fields I studied (psychology and education) - but I am not the only one, not by a long shot.  I love reading, intelligent television shows, well written-thought provoking movies, and strategic board games.  It's not my problem that he could not keep up with my quirky mind.
Another way that I am different is that I didn't need "saving".  I was not a single mother fighting to make ends meet.  I was not in an abusive relationship prior to meeting my ex.  I was naive about relationships, and so I would not be surprised if he enjoyed being the first man I dated longer than a few weeks, the first man I told that I loved, the first man I moved in with, etc.  Eventually I think he no longer felt superior and actively sought out situations to feed his ego.

I am more of a home body, the type of person who enjoys binge watching a new television show or just relaxing on the couch while finishing up a good book.  I don't need to be socially active every night of the week.  I like my alone time.  I would say that I am more introverted than extroverted - I don't like that feeling of walking into a new situation where I am not sure what is expected of me - and I am happier with a small group of close friends.  I can enjoy just the quiet, peacefulness of a walk in the park.  It was odd to me how he could not keep still and needed to be so active.

Of course it was his charm and charismatic personality that attracted me to him in the first place - but really I am looking for someone quieter.  Someone who is a little geeky, a little nerdy, and has a kind heart.  I have started to put myself out there with online dating, but mostly I am just going to have fun and not worry - not give into the fear of "new things".  

I am worth it, and that is all that counts.

image courtesy



Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Weekly Update: March 12 to 18

Not much to update on the weight loss front as I did not go to my WW meeting on March 15.

It was my mom's birthday and we took her out for dinner on Friday night.  It was my parents, my two younger brothers, the girlfriend of one brother, and myself.  We went to Vivo - the same place we went for my birthday in October - and had copious amounts of delicious, family-style Italian food.

Saturday was my mom's actual birthday - but little brother #1 (the one with the girlfriend) was going skiing in Banff with some buddies, so we stuck to our normal routine of taking my grandmother out for dinner.  Little brother #2 actually came out with us (he normally stays home) and we went to Chili's and had delicious fajitas.

Sunday night we made my mom a dark chocolate tart for dessert and roast chicken with snap peas, squash, mashed potatoes and dressing for dinner.

Surprisingly I did not gain 10 pounds, and I might actually be down a little bit at my WW meeting this week.  Even if I end up staying the same or gaining a bit - I will call it a win.

Where I have made good progress is with getting divorced.  I spoke to a paralegal last night and he drew up the Statement of Claim for Divorce.  He will file next week at the courthouse and then the STBX (soon to be ex) will go into their Calgary office to be served.  Then I receive the papers, sign them, and send them back with a copy of my marriage certificate.  Then I just have to wait for the Affidavit to be signed by a judge - and my divorce will be finalized.  That should take 3 to 6 months.

I think I will need to have a party once I get a copy of the final divorce papers.

I admit, I am a little sad.  Mostly I just want to get this all over with so that I have no reason to talk to my STBX anymore.  Again I am thankful we did not have any children, so that I can actually cut him out of my life forever.

The other change on the horizon is that sometime this spring/summer my youngest brother and I will be moving into a condo together.  We have asked our parent's real estate agent to start looking for available places, plus I have been looking at the MLS listings online.  We want at least a 2 bedroom, 1.5 bath condo in an area that will be convenient to take transit to downtown.  Our budget is around 200,000 to 250,000 - depending on condo fees and what those include.  We are not afraid of something that needs some work (floors, paint, new cupboards, etc) as my brother is really handy and I can help as well.  It just needs good bones.

So I should be living on my own (well mostly, little brother #2 will be there) and divorced and settled by my birthday in October.  Hopefully I will also have lost 30 to 40 pounds by then as well - and be that much closer to my weight loss goal.  The future is bright.

image provided by

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Weekly Update: March 5 to 11

Ok, back to the regular schedule of weigh-ins and updates.  The Spring Challenge with Sparkpeople starts today.  I participated in the Winter Challenge, and I did well, but I know I can do better.

Weight Watchers Weigh-In:

Original Weight: 314.8
Previous Weight (March 1): 267.8
Today's Weight (March 8): 266.4
Change: -1.4
Total Loss: -48.4

Total Loss since May 2012: -55.8
Total Loss since Nov 2005: -70.0

SP Weigh In
Previous Weight (Feb 22): 266.8
Today's Weight (March 8): 263.6 

Nice!  Another pound (and almost a half) gone!  The scale is moving in the right direction.  This Friday we are going out for dinner for my mom's birthday, so I won't see what I actually lost this week coming up until the week after that.  I know the meal will be heavy and salty.

I can't wait to be down a total of 50 pounds since I started my WW 2.0 journey.  That will feel really good.

The weather has improved greatly over the past 5 days.  Everything is melting and I can actually go for walks at lunch time again.  I love getting fresh air while I get a bit of exercise.

(image courtesy the Edmonton Sun)

Friday, March 7, 2014

Weekly Update . . . . well really Update for the Month of February

It has been a pretty crazy month.  I was in Victoria from Feb 6 to 9 (missing one WW meeting).  Then on Feb 15 I forgot to set my alarm and I slept in, missing another meeting.

I also spent most of the month not really following the program, especially not exercising.  First I had a bad cold, and then I got out of the habit.  Got to get back on track.

Weight Watchers Weigh-In:

Original Weight: 314.8
Previous Weight (Feb 1): 268.6
Today's Weight (Feb 22): 268.8
Change: +0.2
Total Loss: -46.0

Total Loss since May 2012: -53.4
Total Loss since Nov 2005: -67.6

SP Weigh In
Previous Weight (Feb 1): 265.8
Today's Weight (Feb 22): 266.8

So all in all, not bad.  I only went up 0.2 and that is nothing.  If I can just get back on track I will see a loss this week or next.

So that was Feb 22, and here is the update for March 1:

Weight Watchers Weigh-In:

Original Weight: 314.8
Previous Weight (Feb 22): 268.8
Today's Weight (Feb 22): 267.8
Change: -1.0
Total Loss: -47.0

Total Loss since May 2012: -54.4
Total Loss since Nov 2005: -68.6

Not bad at all for still not exercising.  How the heck do I get my working out motivation back?  I need to figure that one out.

In truth I have not exercised this week either.  Unfortunately I came down with what I think was food poisoning on Wednesday morning.  On my home scale I was at 267 on Tuesday morning, on Wednesday "morning" (it was around 5:30am after two trips to the bathroom) I was 264.  On Thursday morning I was at 262.  I basically cleaned out my system, lol.  This morning I was back up to 263.

I just want my intestines to go back to normal and then see a 1 or 2 pound loss tomorrow at WW.  Come on digestive system - first I was tired of all the trips to the bathroom, now I am plugged up.  Sorry for the TMI, but grrrrrrrrrrr it's aggravating.

Lesson to self - do not try to eat food that you are not sure about the expiry date, even if it smells/tastes ok.